Turtles, Tim and Green Tea
Tim and I went to the park today. Eww! Eww! Wait. Let me start at the beginning.
I had a date with Maah North today. He's my UPS man. So when he showed, carrying a box full of ...oh... EVERY PIECE OF CLOTHING I OWN. It was Christmas morning.. Again. Cause Christmas morning happened the other day when Maah brought my laptop too. (I'm wondering now if someday my UPS guy is going to google his name, find it here and then sue me. Just wonderin. Hope not.)
After freaking out and trying on 35 outfits - I realized that I had taken 3 celebrex. My mother is going to kill me when she reads this so...
NOTE TO MOM: It was an accident and I'm fine and it actually makes for a funny story so hang in there. And that was a run on sentence so if you're gonna be mad, be mad about my poor editing.
And we're back! You guys know what Celebrex is don't you? It's a prescription pain killer. I take them because I have monster cramps. Monster, Godzilla cramps sent from the devil. I tell myself that I take the pain killers so the cramps go away. But truth be told, they never go away (when they are visiting). They are a nasty, horrid strain of cramps that are immune to pills. But the pain killers help me not to care. (this is where it helps the story to picture me wearing a kimono, one high heel, and an empty martini glass... "You're shtopid, go da shtaking of da pillshhh.."
So I'm on the downtown A train, and I'm hanging onto the poll and I think - really super calmly - "Well now. I just might pass out." But, I'm fine with it. I'm like, smiling and thinking, "O.k. No biggie. Overdosed on pain pillsssssss...."
I get off the train and realize how hungry I am. I make a bee line to Starbucks and buy one of those giganto green tea frappacinos. After bopping across the street and dodging a guy who wants to know who cuts my hair(!!!), I sit down and begin to sip my drink.
The sugar makes me feel normal. I wipe the cold sweat off my lip. Tim comes to join me and I warn him: Just for fun! I might have taken too many pills! (it's like spending the day with Liza Minelli I imagine.)
We had a great day though. I DID successfully dodge the "Overdose Bullet" by the way. And no, the cramps never go away.
Favorite parts of today:
1. TURTLES. Turtles in the pond in Central Park and they were playing bumper turtles in the water. Tim and I imagine what it looks like inside the turtles' shells. Also we fantasize about what it looks like inside Oscar the Grouch's garbage can. Later, when I get home tonight I ask Adam if I can have a turtle. He tells me there is a "Turtle Rule." (The turtle rule is the same as the "duck rule" where I announced I wanted to bring home a duck and he announced that he would eat it.)
2. There were all these Japanese (we think??) brides getting their pictures taken in the park.
3. We saw a bunch of kids running up a hill. They lined up at the bottom of the hill and did the "ready! Set? Go!!" thing and then sprinted up the hill. But there was one kid. Oh no. The fat kid. He was doomed from the beginning. He was dyin. It took him a full minute longer than the rest of the kids. Oh my. Poor thing. Cause who sprints uphill for fun? What kind of sadistic kids do that??
4. Tim and I had an all around wonderful day - we're really very alike. We also drank lots of green tea all day.
Amazing things:
1. Fat kid
2. Shocker stop signs
3. Admitting that I watched Sesame Street until 15. THERE! I admit it! The freedom!
4. Seeing Trump Tower. And then being totally underwhelmed by Trump Tower.
Grateful For:
1. Tim!
2. Spring time/ Central Park
3. Little cafes
4. Rediscovering great music
5. The fact that my body allows me to walk around Manhattan all day with nothing to hold me back. Not everyone who wants to can and I'm grateful I can.
I had a date with Maah North today. He's my UPS man. So when he showed, carrying a box full of ...oh... EVERY PIECE OF CLOTHING I OWN. It was Christmas morning.. Again. Cause Christmas morning happened the other day when Maah brought my laptop too. (I'm wondering now if someday my UPS guy is going to google his name, find it here and then sue me. Just wonderin. Hope not.)
After freaking out and trying on 35 outfits - I realized that I had taken 3 celebrex. My mother is going to kill me when she reads this so...
NOTE TO MOM: It was an accident and I'm fine and it actually makes for a funny story so hang in there. And that was a run on sentence so if you're gonna be mad, be mad about my poor editing.
And we're back! You guys know what Celebrex is don't you? It's a prescription pain killer. I take them because I have monster cramps. Monster, Godzilla cramps sent from the devil. I tell myself that I take the pain killers so the cramps go away. But truth be told, they never go away (when they are visiting). They are a nasty, horrid strain of cramps that are immune to pills. But the pain killers help me not to care. (this is where it helps the story to picture me wearing a kimono, one high heel, and an empty martini glass... "You're shtopid, go da shtaking of da pillshhh.."
So I'm on the downtown A train, and I'm hanging onto the poll and I think - really super calmly - "Well now. I just might pass out." But, I'm fine with it. I'm like, smiling and thinking, "O.k. No biggie. Overdosed on pain pillsssssss...."
I get off the train and realize how hungry I am. I make a bee line to Starbucks and buy one of those giganto green tea frappacinos. After bopping across the street and dodging a guy who wants to know who cuts my hair(!!!), I sit down and begin to sip my drink.
The sugar makes me feel normal. I wipe the cold sweat off my lip. Tim comes to join me and I warn him: Just for fun! I might have taken too many pills! (it's like spending the day with Liza Minelli I imagine.)
We had a great day though. I DID successfully dodge the "Overdose Bullet" by the way. And no, the cramps never go away.
Favorite parts of today:
1. TURTLES. Turtles in the pond in Central Park and they were playing bumper turtles in the water. Tim and I imagine what it looks like inside the turtles' shells. Also we fantasize about what it looks like inside Oscar the Grouch's garbage can. Later, when I get home tonight I ask Adam if I can have a turtle. He tells me there is a "Turtle Rule." (The turtle rule is the same as the "duck rule" where I announced I wanted to bring home a duck and he announced that he would eat it.)
2. There were all these Japanese (we think??) brides getting their pictures taken in the park.
3. We saw a bunch of kids running up a hill. They lined up at the bottom of the hill and did the "ready! Set? Go!!" thing and then sprinted up the hill. But there was one kid. Oh no. The fat kid. He was doomed from the beginning. He was dyin. It took him a full minute longer than the rest of the kids. Oh my. Poor thing. Cause who sprints uphill for fun? What kind of sadistic kids do that??
4. Tim and I had an all around wonderful day - we're really very alike. We also drank lots of green tea all day.
Amazing things:
1. Fat kid
2. Shocker stop signs
3. Admitting that I watched Sesame Street until 15. THERE! I admit it! The freedom!
4. Seeing Trump Tower. And then being totally underwhelmed by Trump Tower.
Grateful For:
1. Tim!
2. Spring time/ Central Park
3. Little cafes
4. Rediscovering great music
5. The fact that my body allows me to walk around Manhattan all day with nothing to hold me back. Not everyone who wants to can and I'm grateful I can.
posted by In California Dreamin. at
11:43 PM
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